When I arrived at the office this morning I was greeted by this fellow seated at my desk. Not quite sure what to make of it, I sent the following e-mail, titled “New SVP of Engineering” to my colleagues.

I returned from travel to Pasadena last week to find my replacement seated at my desk. Here is what I can tell you about him.

He is the strong, silent type.

He is an exceptionally good listener and never interrupts.

He remains extremely calm under pressure.

His ego is in check and he is extremely humble.

He is not a fan of management by walking around.

He takes frequent naps and can endure the most boring meetings.

He is immune to pressure from management and is willing to take a hit for the team.

He can be a little cold and some find him devoid of emotional depth.

He is not easily moved from his positions.

He has said nothing to convince me he knows much about robots but neither did I when I first arrived.

No one has come forward to claim credit for the practical joke or to reveal the significance. I will continue to investigate. The crash dummy, which is the actual weight of a person, was probably used to demonstrate that our largest robot could drag an injured soldier out of harms way.