I am Maya Calabria and I believe in living fully.

You can filter your experiences in the hopes that you will protect yourself from pain and fear. Nothing can hurt you from an arm’s length away. By reserving your emotions, investing less interest, and taking fewer risks you can lessen any pain that comes your way. But all at the cost of never feeling anything more than you allow yourself to. Or you can dream big, love fully, devote yourself to friendship, and trust others.

It’s true that if you dream big you might fall from dangerous heights. If you love fully, you may be hurt as a result. Trust can be betrayed and friendships can fall apart. Diving into life can unveil harsh truths. This is a very dangerous way to live; daunting, terrifying and thrilling. It is a goal of mine to live like this because I flatly reject living life void of feeling. I believe life is a gift. In order to appreciate it, one must experience every part.

The first time I ever killed a chicken was when I was 11 years old. For the past 4 years I have spent three weeks of my summer in Vermont attending an all-girls sleep away camp. At camp we grow most of our own food and at the end of the session we all sit down to harvest meal. The day before hand, the whole camp goes to the farm to harvest all the food that we have been growing. We also raise chickens. Campers have the opportunity to participate in the chicken harvest if they want to. I did. The farm hand, Beth, showed us how the process worked by demonstrating with the first chicken. Those of us who were still interested found partners and lined up after catching a chicken. I remember practicing my hatchet swing as we waited anxiously for our turn. I stepped up to the block as my partner extended the chicken’s neck between the pegs.

“I’m going to count to three,” Beth said “and then you’re going to chop here.” She pointed to the neck. Without any further notice she started counting, “One, Two, Three!” That was it; I didn’t have a moment to think about it, I just went with it and swung the hatchet. We proceeded to pluck it, gut it, and put it on ice for the meal. I have participated in this experience every year since. Chicken harvest isn’t exactly a beautiful process; in fact it’s quite messy, tense, and emotional for a lot of people. I chose to do it though, because it is a natural part of life and I want to experience every part of life, even if it scares me.

When I die, I want to have really really lived because I have no idea what happens next, not a clue. If there is a heaven or another life or anything beyond this one, then that would be great news! But just to play it safe, I’ll assume that all there is for sure is this life right now, the one I’m living. I believe that if this is indeed the only life I will get, I must jump at any experiences that will broaden my understanding of it. I’m going to do life right! And if I can do that, if I can take those risks, dance to my heart’s content, and see what there is to see, then when my time comes, I won’t be scared or full of regret.

You only live life once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

I have not played soccer since early November and decided this morning it was time to start training for the spring season. I arrived at the Edge Sports Center turf field at 6 AM only to discover I was half an hour early and the only one there. I used the time to stretch, warm up, and grab this photo of the pressurized dome bubble. Despite all the trekking I did in December, I was shocked by my dismal state of conditioning. Halfway through the two-hour session, I was completely exhausted, my muscles fatigued and my knees on fire. I wisely stopped before injuring anything and wondered during my drive home if this might be my last soccer season. Proper training will restore my stamina and strength but I may have reached the limit of what Ibuprofen will do for my knees. Only time will tell.

Jeanine’s sister, Lauren, traveled from Indianapolis to visit for the weekend. She wanted to witness Maya’s Coming of Age ceremony at church this Sunday. The three of us enjoyed dinner at Bondir, a new restaurant in downtown Concord featuring sustainable modern American cuisine. We returned home just in time to watch the Winter Olympics opening ceremony with the rest of the family.

I have memorialized my Nepalese adventure in the form of a self-published photo book. I tried to present the images in a semi-chronological and thematic layout. Click on the View Full Screen icon (four arrows pointing outward) to view with the best resolution.

A massive winter storm has Maya home from school today. I normally don’t mind driving with snow on the ground but have learned to work from home when heavy snow is falling during commute hours, as was the case today. Snow removal in Massachusetts is generally excellent but it is simply impossible for the plows to keep up when snow is falling at the rate of 2 inches per hour and they have to contend with traffic as well. At noon, I cleared about a foot of snow from the driveway so stranded house guests, Jeremy and Zach could make their way home. It was still snowing when I took this picture of Maya at 6 PM.

A group of my current and former iRobot colleagues (sobering to think about the ratio) met this evening for drinks and appetizers at an intimate gathering to celebrate Jeff Beck (2nd from left), my former boss. I really enjoyed catching up with everyone and hearing, for the first time in some cases, inside stories from the past. As a farewell present, I gave Jeff a USB memory stick containing several dozen photos of him that I have taken over the years.

As I walked through the parking lot at work this morning I noticed this key on the ground. Absent any identification whatsoever I decided to circulate a photograph by e-mail. Within minutes the grateful owner contacted me to retrieve her key. It was a nice way to start an otherwise exhausting day. Having completed her mid-terms and Coming of Age preparations Maya returned to the robotics club today where the pressure is on to complete their entry for the rapidly approaching FIRST competition deadline.

Maya hosted an all girl Super Bowl and slumber party this evening. Most guests seemed to understand the rules of the game and for those that did not, clarification was offered. A play from scrimmage is described as the “two lines crashing into each other” in Maya-speak which helped her explain the concept of a “down”. As much time was spent on iPhones and pig-piling as watching the game. I watch primarily for the commercials and was not disappointed this year, especially when Sonos aired a well done spot which featured at least one product that was developed during my stint with the company.

Some of you may have noticed that this website was offline for the last 36 hours. Early Saturday morning, I set up a website for Nicolai on my hosting service. In so doing, I managed to overwrite nearly 9 years’ worth of daily entries and crashed the site. I was panic-stricken and spent several hours trying unsuccessfully to restore the site from backup files. Even the hosting service technical support folks were unable to restore the missing files and had to escalate to their 2nd tier experts. Fortunately, they were able to complete the restore operation and I was back online this evening. I have copies of all photos that appear on the site but would have been inconsolable had I lost all that I have written over these many years. In this digital age, one cannot be too cautious about backing up irreplaceable information.

PLUS

EQUALS

After more than a decade living in Massachusetts one would think I now understand the concept of and legal need for an annual car inspection. Earlier this week while returning from work, I received a $55 reminder, courtesy of the Bedford Police Department. Not much to be said when you are a year past the renewal date. This morning I obtained the necessary inspection and updated sticker.

Publishing a second sunrise in as many weeks risks boring regular visitors to this blog. From my perspective, however, each one is entirely unique and I can’t help but run for my camera when I see the light show starting up. Jeanine openly questions my sanity as I leave the house in my bathrobe and slippers to stand in the freezing cold snow to capture such moments. Perhaps it is the sheer brevity of the event that compels me to create a permanent record. From start to finish, this morning’s color lasted for less than 2 minutes. I took dozens of photos revealing that the peak color lasted for only ten seconds.

Dinner conversation this evening centered on the future of education and different learning styles. Joining us from Minnesota was my sister-in-law, Marie, in town for the day on business, and Nicolai’s friend, Karuna, who arrived bearing baked gifts. Despite our current dieting efforts both Jeanine and I had to sample the yummy chocolate chip cookies which were well worth the caloric setback. Maya is in the middle of mid-year tests with both Math and World Cultures scheduled for tomorrow. She seems confident and well prepared although this has come at the expense of robotics club attendance. I am hoping she returns once her exams are behind her.

FirstLook is a 5-pound throwable robot used to provide immediate situational awareness, perform persistent observation and to investigate confined spaces. Equally tough and cute it is one of my favorite robots. iRobot engineers have now added an infrared camera payload option which enables night vision. Here the software engineer who enabled the new functionality demonstrates for the business unit leadership team.

Maya produces this work of art in her 3D graphics class. She created a 3D model of the snowman and then rendered it with lighting to match the photograph of clouds into which she composited it. Equally impressive is her design for a retractable screen phone of the future. Her grandmother will be proud of her artistic flare and ingenuity.